Full Hands - and lovin' it...

On Monday of this week I took the kids with me to pick up turkeys for the Thanksgiving baskets we would be handing out at church. We grabbed a cart and took off - all five us.

As usual we got stares from numerous people no doubt wondering why my children were not in school (we home school) and what insanity had driven me to bring all four (ages from 9 down to 2) out into a grocery store.

Passing an older couple they said, "Boy you have your hands full". This is not an unusual comment - in fact I hear it very often.

However, since the loss of Caleb - it has gained a new signifigance.

I was told at the age of 19 after being diagnosed with SLE (Systemic Lupus) and several "sister diseases" including Grave's Disease which they treated with I-131 radiation therepy resulting in Hypothyroid, that I would never be able to have children.

However, at the age of 21: after desperate prayers to God - my heart's disire was answered and I entered the magnifigant life-changing season of motherhood. Following the birth of Anna (born 4 1/2 weeks early - she was due mid-may and born mid April) I have had three more healthy babies - Chase "Rocky", Justin, and Rachel.

My hands would have been empty had it not been for the love, mercy and grace of Abba Father!

And though my arms are empty right now from the loss Caleb....I am grateful my hands are full.

This day I looked with a smile and said, "Yes, my hands are full...but I would rather they be full than to have had them left empty. My children are a blessing, and they are good kids."

The older lady smiled - a gently recognition of the truth - a mother's heart is happiest when her hands are full! Too quickly this season passes and we must find things to fill our hands while we watch our children venture into lives of their own and we wait for the seaons of grandparenthood.

Let me never take for granted these precious days for I know not how many days God has numbered for my life or the lives of those I love.